“This is never going to end, is it?”
(Source)
I was sitting down to dinner with my girlfriend as news of the new Omicron variant broke. As we took the lids of the tupperware and smelled the steaming curry, my heart sank.
South African scientists, in an exemplary display of transparency and trust, said that a new variant has been discovered though little was known about its transmissibility, the severity of the illness it causes or how easily it could evade the protections provided by vaccines. A new variant was almost certain to arise, particularly in light of the inequitable approach to vaccination globally. But knowing that something is likely to happen doesn’t make it any easier when it actually does.
“Do you think you’re maybe checking the news too much?” my girlfriend asked delicately a few hours later. I was checking every 20 minutes or so, hungry for information. I explained that I was watching to see what would break in time for the 9 o’clock news. Unconvinced, she turned back to the television.
Tony Holohan and the Minister for Health both said they were concerned. The head of Moderna said vaccines most likely won't be as effective. Pfizer said they could have a vaccine ready in 100 days. That sounds great but it’ll be a lot longer before there’s a shot in the arm of everyone who needs it.
It all felt like another horrifying loop of deja vu. On Sunday, I read Zeynep’s piece about how lucky we are to have this early warning (thank you South Africa!) and how we should focus on public health rather than “pandemic theatrics”. Her NYT column was eminently sensible. I don’t know how I would have gotten through the last 21 months without writers like her. People who understand the science, ask smart questions and write articles that distill the complexity into something us non-scientists can understand. Public health advice is essential, but I also want to try to understand the history, politics and culture that shapes our collective response throughout the pandemic.
Back in February 2020, I read a piece in The Atlantic called ‘Cancel Everything’. I emailed it to my boss, trying not to panic. A week later, the Taoiseach Leo Varadkar stood outside Blair House in Washington DC and announced that the country was going into lockdown. He didn’t use that language. The first measures were scheduled to last for just over 2 weeks, though of course that’s not what happened.
In light of all of the new variant and the high levels of virus circulating in the community, I’ve started to cancel things. I’m very disappointed to miss out on seeing friends and being out in the world after a long and exhausting year. But I don’t want to risk it. I am risk averse by nature. My health (mental, physical) is such that I think carefully about it. I’m not worried about getting a mild dose. In “normal times”, we all got sick with head colds and after a few days under the duvet returned to life and forgot about it. What scares me is long covid. I have seen and read about too many people who suffer long term effects after contracting the virus. A virus which we still know so little about. If my doctor were here, I suspect she’d dismiss those concerns and that’s fair enough. But she doesn't have to live in this body nor does she know what I’ve already endured.
So I am cautious. I read the articles and study the graphs. And then, I make a plan that feels right to me. That’s all fine in theory, but this time it’s made more complicated by the fact that society is completely open and functioning as ‘normal’. It feels like a very different thing to opt out of socialising when everyone else (or so it feels) is out partying and you’re the one anti-social person. Interpersonally, that gets complicated. I am also planning to travel over the Christmas period which is an extra factor to consider. It’s like we’re living some strange double life where on the one hand everything carries on as normal, and on the other, there’s a huge cloud of doom sitting on the horizon.
I think back to March 2020. I remember rationalising to myself that a few weeks at home would be fine, enjoyable even. That it would blow over. 21 months later, it’s clear that this is never going to end. We’re all just going to have to find a way to live alongside it.
The knowledge that the worst of this could have been avoided if the WHO had acted a month earlier does little to make that easier.
(This piece was written 2.12.21. The situation may have changed by the time you read it. If we’ve learned anything over the last 21 months, it’s that this pandemic life is full of surprises!)
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